Heinz Beck, London: ‘everything is overengineered’ – restaurant review


With its fastidious attention to the food, a meal at Heinz Beck can leave you feeling utterly hollow

Heinz Beck at Brown’s Hotel, Albemarle Street, London W1S 4BP (020 7518 4004). Meal for two, including drinks and service £150+

Set into the back of the yielding, overstuffed seats at Brown’s Hotel on Albemarle Street in London’s Mayfair are what look to me like air vents. I don’t question this. Of course the sort of people who come here sweat more than most; it’s all that Botox and entitlement pumping through their bloodstreams. It’s got to have some sort of impact on their bodily secretions. It turns out the square, brass inflow ducts are actually handles designed to help the waiters move the over-engineered chairs around. Possibly while the clientele are still sitting in them.

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